I haven’t posted in a while. I am overwhelmed, and am very tired. There is so much going on in the blogosphere that I would like to comment on, then the ADD kicks in. As a result, nothing happens. I have also discovered some new incredible bloggers. (More on those fine people later) But for now…
I pose a question. How do you say goodbye to two of the most wonderful people in your life? How do you express your gratitude to them for not only caring for you, but for giving you your core values and at the same time allowing you to evolve to be the person that you now have become?
How do you do this when they are in a constant state of confusion? These two incredible people are reeling, trying to get a balance that they will never again achieve, and are frightened. Never again will clear thinking be a part of their repertoire. Never again will they be able to go about their business independently. They are fighting to maintain their balance and their dignity, yet find it hard to function on the day to day basis that we all take for granted. They are realizing this now. They are afraid and the fear exacerbates the situation. The fear of giving up control and the fear of taking control escalates on both sides and the tension grows.
Verbal conflagrations ensue.
How do you gently tell these folks that they cannot drive anymore; that they must let others pay their bills; that they must surrender their independence?
How do you go about taking control of an out of control situation and still let these people know that you love them and they are still honored?
My parents are in their mid 90’s; they have been married for 72 years. They have lived through a time that no one should have to go through… and they have survived. Now at the end of their lives, what am I to say, or do?
As I said before, a rhetorical question…
But one that I now wrestle with daily.